Do you want to know a secret? Well, it’s more of a confession really.

Here it is: Sometimes I’m not sure about what I’m doing.

I try to talk a good game. But every so often, my uncertainty bubbles up to the surface and I find myself in a bit of a cloudy funk for a day or so.

Do you ever feel like that? Like, you look around you, at what you’re doing, or where you are, or who you’re with and you’re like, “What in the heck am I doing?”

One time my sisters and I were sitting in the living room with our mom and dad, and dad looked at all of us and said, “Twenty years ago, I didn’t know any of you, and now I’m responsible for feeding and clothing and paying for everything for all of you.” He of course didn’t mean anything by it and we all laughed.

But I suppose that’s why people divorce or buy Ferrari’s at the age of 50 or get plastic surgery or up and leave everything to go backpack through Asia, or worst case scenario– kill themselves (Don’t read anything into that last one. I’m just pontificating.). Because one day, they look at their life, and maybe the babies are smelly and screaming, or maybe the wife doesn’t look like she did when she was 20, or maybe the professional success hasn’t come as anticipated, or maybe the kids at school are cruel and hurtful, or maybe life’s not as glamorous as pictured in college, or maybe something just didn’t go as planned, and you think, “What am I doing here?”

Well. Today is one of those days. The rush of “getting going” has died down and I woke up a little bit nervous and a little bit directionless. I’m a little bit uncertain about what to do next to make this all work. And I’m totally blank about where this will all end up.

But I’m also one who thinks that just because you have an “off” day, doesn’t mean you should throw in the towel or shave your head. Just because your spouse loses their looks or humor or appeal, doesn’t mean you should leave them. Just because the house is a wreck and the kids are hungry and you haven’t showered for 4 days, doesn’t mean motherhood isn’t sweet. Just because your bank account isn’t overflowing and customers aren’t flying through the door, doesn’t mean your professional life is a failure. Just because people are unkind to you or ignore you, doesn’t mean you’re not worth more than the world. And just because you’re uncertain about what to do next, doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong path.

It just means you’re living. And sometimes (most of the time) life is uncertain. Sometimes it’s confusing. And it rarely turns out how you picture it. Yes, sometimes a change of course is needed. Sometimes doing something drastic can do much to add some spice back into life–I do think life should be spicy.* But I think most of the time, on rough, uncertain days, you just need to (read: I need to), say a little prayer, and then get up, get moving, and go do something. Even if it’s just take a shower or a walk around the block. Make a list of five things you can do, that you have control over that day. And do them one at a time. Cross them off the list. And celebrate your success each time.

Because the great thing is, that eventually–and I really do believe this–the uncertainty or worry or whatever goes away. And you see clearly that life always turns out better than you picture it.

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*Just wanted to clarify that I do not advocate divorce or death as possible options for change and/or spice. Although I do advocate divorce in abusive situations or instances of infidelity.