What Do You Really Want? Reader Response


It’s a quiet snowy morning here in Utah. The sun is trying to peek through and I for one am whole-heartedly cheering him on. This white world is breathtaking but it’s bitter cold and my bones are shaking.

So this weekend I went through and read again all the comments and emails left on “What Do You Really Want.” It’s inspiring to me, these desires and dreams and hopes that manifest themselves when we step back from what we have.

This question is one I’ve asked myself a lot since I lost my job. What do I really want? And my “problem” isn’t that I can’t think of anything–it’s that the length of my list wraps around the world. But today I want to share your responses:

(I added a little back story on a few of these as I thought doing so would help readers who don’t know the responder understand the weight of the comment)

Rebecca said…I want to live in the country and raise Alpacas~oh, and be skinny…live in the country, be skinny, and raise Alpacas!

Nancy B. said…I want to be in the temple with my husband and every single one of my children and their spouses.

Kaycie Q (my baby sis) said…i want us to be on the beach with our spouses and children…all of them. with matey (our dog) and the parentals. playing baseball, drinking smoothies, and being so tan it’s ridiculous. and talking about life.
Coordination Queen said…That is hard. Because there are so many things that make me happy. But I think at this very moment my dream that I have yet to realize is losing all of this baby weight… thinking about it right now (the process of getting there) doesn’t make me light up, but being there… I think I would burst.

Lori (my mom who lives 3,000 miles away from her 3 daughters) said…Living near all of my children so we could have Sunday dinners…you can cook most of the time :0)…But I would even cook just to have that! Just near enough to be able to hear all that “noise” and to get a hug. I would live anywhere to have that! And then we could make beautiful music together! That’s the music in my soul!

Cristi said…More than anything? To be able to experience a pregnancy – full term with healthy delivery – in this life. BUT … having said that … right now I AM happier than I’ve ever been :) Oh, and losing about 20 lbs would make me happy too. As would producing an album.
(This is my friend Cristi, who has not been able to bear children. She and her husband just adopted their first baby in October.)

Catie said…I really want to grow old and gray. I dream about being cancer-free. It would make me happy to get to see each of my children married in the temple. I think about eternity. I light up when I am with my husband and children laughing, and I hope to light up every day for a very, very long time.
(This is my dear friend Catie, who is fighting her second battle with cancer while being an amazing mother to her three young children. I love you Catie.)

Maryhelen said…Writing, speaking, helping women young and old understand and remember who they really are. And somehow incorporate music into that. And teaching. And nursing. or maybe paramedicine. I do have to add my desire to be skinny to Rebecca’s… someday soon I hope there’s a big fat check mark next to that one!

Heather said…Gosh, Krista is it really lame that I still don’t have an answer for this?! I guess its hard because this isn’t the life that I imagined having. Becoming LDS changes your goals and dreams and I guess I have been so caught up in the everyday life of being a wife and mom that I don’t know what I truly want anymore and that is kinda sad. Of course I want to see all my children and their spouses in the temple and I would love to live on the beach and I would love to grow old with my family surrounding me but right now my biggest wish is for a day to myself to sleep and eat junk food without sharing it and read my 1500 emails and google reader posts. :)
(I met Heather while on my mission in Washington. She joined the LDS church in her early 20s.)

Sara said…I love Heather’s post! The last few days I’ve woken up and thought “what do I really want to do today?” and most of the time it has been 1. eat deliciously fattening fast food 2. either watch a chick flick alone or spend time with girl friends doing something totally self absorbed (like getting a pedicure). But really, that’s not what I REALLY want more than anything. I really want a fantastic relationship with my husband and well adjusted, spiritual, good children. I want all of us to be truly happy because we know who we are and where we’re going. I want to be happy even when life is tough. Because it is tough. Like many other people – I really do want my body to be the way I think it should: skinny! And really, nothing would make me more happy than to raise my kids around all of my siblings, Dustin’s siblings and their kids. The thought of that makes me want to burst. So, if I can remember these overall goals when I drag myself out of bed in the morning I’m sure my days would go much differently!

Annie said…I wish my entire family lived close to one another instead of spread across the country, that our children could grow up together and know each other more than seeing each other once every year or two. And I wish that if we were all close, that all of my friends and my job and my life here stayed with me- just transplanted in a new place. I wish an awful coworker I have would suddenly win the lottery and move far, far, far away and leave me alone! I wish I could have said good bye to an old friend from high school who suddenly died last week at the age of 31 leaving behind his wife and beautiful girls. I wish that I could accomplish everything I need to accomplish in a day without sacrificing sleep. Oh… I could go on and on but I have to go clean up the house before bed! Oh, I’d also like a maid, a masseuse, and a personal chef! :)

Jack’s house said…My life by far is not perfect and there have definitely been trials along the way that I would love to change but at the same time wouldn’t because they have helped to define who I am on the inside and the out. That being said, after having lunch with my husband today, I have realized that there is something that I want more than anything in this world…and that is for my husband to be happy…and right now he just isn’t.
(This is my friend and neighbor Kim. Her baby boy passed away a few years ago. I’m in awe of her.)

Tiffany said…Jack’s house struck a cord with me. Sigh. Don’t know her, but I felt her comment. What do I want more than anything??? That one was tough. There are lots of things that I “want”. Things being the key word there. Part of being human and living in the society we live in I think. But what I really, really want is to grow old and be a grandma. I don’t think it’s going to happen, in fact, thinking that makes me break down into a million pieces and I can’t handle the pain so I DON’T think about it. At least not for very long. But I would love to be healthy and to be old one day. I would give up anything I have to be able to be with my children for a long time.

Jacey said…After reading some of these comments, mine feels a little shallow, but I can own that. I want somebody to like my writing so much that they pay me nicely for it. Or pay me for it, period!
(I don’t think this is shallow at all. I think it’s a worthy goal worth AND you’re totally capable of doing this. In case you wondered what I thought.)

Marie said…babies
(Marie and I grew up together in the South. Her first baby, Olivia, was born still.)

Emily said…Shouldn’t have read everyone else’s because they’re deep . . . honestly, the thing I want most is for my kids to be healthy and safe and grow up to be good guys. When I kneel down to pray that’s first thing I ask for. Scratch that, beg for. So maybe what I need most is to relax and enjoy all I have. What makes me happy? I have a lot of deep-felt gospel answers, but how about I digress and say dancing – gotta do it more these days!

Anonymous said…What I really want is to know that what I’m doing matters. My husband and I are starting the road to becoming foster parents, which is something I feel called to do. Called from deep in my soul. I want to know that my actions on this earth have helped someone, have made their life better. I want to be an old woman, sitting on my porch and watching my grandkids play. I want to not be afraid of death. Actually, that’s the biggest one for me. I want to not be afraid of death. (don’t worry, I don’t have a terminal illness! it’s just that I’ve lost people and questioned my own mortality…)

Anonymous said…I want to be married.

Anonymous said…What do I want most? I want to know that I’m in the right place, doing the right thing. That I’m on the right path to accomplishing my life’s mission.

Is anyone else filled to the brim with understanding and compassion and hope for this group of people who responded? Some of you know each other. Some of you don’t. Some of you are strangers even to me. And your honesty has inspired me.

I want to be more of my true self. I want to dance more (thanks Em!). I want to write more (thanks Jacey!). I want to be more mindful of others and the things they’re going through or have gone through. I want to be more aware of the dreams people around me have and do all I can to help, teach, love, and serve my fellowmen.

Each of us is living a life filled with ups and down, happiness and sorrow, certainty and uncertainty, and when push comes to shove, the things that matter most are people and living a life filled not with “stuff,” but with substance.

What are your thoughts?

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  1. After reading all those comments, I realize I don't have it so bad. Seriously. I just need to remember what I've got and not focus on the negative. Which, in my defense, is pretty tough when barfing my guts out every day! But at least I'm vomiting for a wonderful purpose and blessing.

    You have some fantastic friends, Krista.

  2. Umm, in case YOU are wondering…I ALWAYS wonder what you think. :) And thanks.

    So excited to have you take our pictures tomorrow. I just KNOW you're gonna make my hips disappear! You're THAT good.

    And yes, I am filled to the brim after reading this. Funny how we can all have such varying aspirations, yet we relate to each others' yearnings just the same. Thanks for sharing this with all of us.

  3. My thoughts… I feel silly for having such a trivial goal. I know the little goals are important, but that one, in light of all of the others… I guess I just have a hard time baring my soul on a computer. This is my attempt: So many of these just break my heart. Having had my husband go through cancer twice… I truly don't want for anything. I have a healthy husband and 3 miracles. That. That is what fills me to the brim. And right now it's spilling over just a little.

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